My Little Brother

It all started when my little brother started listening to Devon the Dude. This man talks about smoking, drinking and having sex all the damn time. And my little brother listens to Lil Wayne too, but Lil Wayne talks about sex and smoking. Let me tell you something: does your little brother smoke or drink and have sex? If no, good, enjoy your childhood and don't use the words I can't because you can do anything in this world if you believe in it and I, your big brother, will be there to help you and I love you. Please don't mess your life up. Because I believe you can be successful.

Boxing

I started boxing training and after a year we had our first match. I won. I knocked him out 5 times. I had a cut on my eye and his eyes were fat and I hit him with a right and a left but when I hit him with my right again it was strong.

A Successful Man

My life is not so great and I am trying to make the best of it. I have come across trouble and now I am trying to better myself. I always wanted to be the man or father that my father wasn't. I know it is going to take hard work and I am willing to work to success. I learned what comes easy is not the best for you but what you work hard for is going to benefit you in the long run.

I have a lot of dreams that I want to accomplish and I plan on accomplishing them. First thing I want to do is get my education. Second thing I got to do is be willing to learn and listening. Third thing I got to have a plan and go through with it. The last step I got to accomplish is believe in my self and keep a positive attitude.

Blaming Hip Hop

Teacher's Note: This emerged from a writing assignment I gave on the connections between language and violence.

I would not say Hip Hop is to blame for everything that goes on in our culture, because people are going to do what people want to do. But I would say Hip Hop helps contribute to a portion of what goes on in our communities. Some of the hip hop in this generation disrespects women in all kinds of ways. They're not only disrespecting women but they're also disrespecting the African American culture. They disrespect mostly every female that disrespects themselves, and allows others to disrespect them. They're disrespecting the African American culture by giving other races a negative image of us.

Language and Violence

Teacher's Note: This emerged from a writing assignment I gave on the connections between language and violence.

Domestic violence often starts with words such as B**** and H*. When men say this to women they are threatening them like their dogs and that's not right because that's not what women are and they shouldn't be threatened that way. That also leads to domestic violence because when men say all those types of things to females they treat them like animals and they can even hit them and make them feel like they are less than what they are. So in my opinion racial or sexist words have to do with domestic violence; they are related to each other because those words are the ones that lead to domestic violence.

I've Always Wondered

I've always wondered why staff hate
on me.

I've always wondered why the can't c me
but it's all straight they just
want to be me.

I've always wondered why I'm always locked up.

I've always wondered why I see
hate in me
but it's all straight because
ya can't lay a hand on me.

I've always wondered why I can't
follow a straight road always messing
up waiting for that right road.

Misunderstood

Teacher's Note: This is in response to Emerson's famous observation: "To be great is to be misunderstood."

To be great is to be misunderstood. This quote sinks into my mind because if that's true I am the greatest man in the world. Such an erratic young man who is always misunderstood for stupid, dumb reasons. I like it though, but not a lot because how can you like someone if they don't understand you? So yes that quote sinks into my head like the blood inside my brain. Maybe someday I will understand this quote?

Last Time

I still remember the last day
we laid eyes on each other.
it hurt so bad cause I
knew it was the last time.
Jump outs
all you hear is "get on the ground
and you freeze."
laying beside you looking
into your eyes and I see the
fear
and the love you have
for me.
I wanted to tell you for
the last time I love you.
But I couldn't, I couldn't
say it cause I didn't want
to know that it was going
to be the last time.
I lay in my bed
thinking of you all night
and having a baby
grow inside of me.
I can wait for you but
I don't want our daughter
to ask when are you
coming back...?
I can't just be like....

Well...the last time....

22 Days

Twenty-two days left! I try not to think about it so the days slide by with swiftness, but I can't help but think about it when I am in my room, behind closed doors, reminiscing in my existence. When I am released, I will lay low and stay out of trouble to the fullest possibility. I feel like my probation officer is out to get me as he keeps violating me in probation. I feel like he has no pity for me and I am misunderstood. If he were to walk in my shoes for a day, maybe he would understand me and think twice about his decisions against me. I can't help but feel hatred against him for he has taken me away from my family and people that love me. I am willing to do the time if I do the crime but I don't deserve this much of a punishment.

Prayer

Man I really am ready to leave. Mean I really want that 6 month program and I really am looking forward to changing. I am really getting frustrated I pray every night, hope that I get that program. I miss my family so much, I hope they was here. When I get a phone call and I talk to my brother, he acts like he don't care how I'm in here struggling. So God I ask you to let me get this 6 month program and continue protecting me in the facilities--anything but down state.

Missing Christmas

I am writing about how I am going to miss Christmas and New Year's for the second year in a row and I'm mad because I am going to miss my brother's birthday and I've just been thinking every night that for three years that I've been incarcerated or been in a program and not there with my brother that if he still would have the same respect that he did when I was out. But I was told by my parents by observing my younger brother's ways they noticed that he wasn't very excited in what he was doing around the house because he was alone and couldn't enjoy playing the game by himself. So I've been thinking when I get out that I'm gonna do what I gotta do to get off probation so I can spend the rest of my life with my family without worrying about being incarcerated again, because if I do, it's gonna be 12-18 months downstate.