If you knew Me

Teacher's Note: This journal entry came from a prompt I periodically give, "If you knew me, you would know...."

If you knew me, you would know that I am not a person of Hate. That I am not a person of destruction. That the ideas in my head roam around and come out as letters on a page, telling a story of a nice young man with dreams of becoming a star. Dreams of becoming a prodigy of my father. Dreams of seeing my mother happy and living the way she wants to live, instead of worrying about me. I want her to live her life. I want the tears to stop streaming down her face.

I've Learned About People That....

I've learned about people that they're all different, but yet they're all the same. I say this because no matter all of a person's physical attributes, the one thing that makes them the same is that they're human. What I mean is that no matter how big, small, strong, weak, fast, you are human. So you will always have your emotions. So you will have good days and bad days. You have your up and down. What makes people different is will power. Nothing is impossible to do, you just have to have the will power to do it. Some people say that the difference between us is looks. Well, I believe that good looks are in the eye of the beholder and money is never ugly. What I mean by that is, a lot of people believe that when you are broke, you're ugly and when you're rich, beautiful. Also, I've learned that you treat others the way you want to be treated so I do that, because I know that my feelings are not to be played with. I know if mine are dangerous, you know love and anger make you do crazy things. I believe it, do you?

Life is Hard

Life is hard. Dieing must be easy. Sometimes I wonder where u really go when u die if there is a God (keyword if). Are you really asleep until Christ comes or are u in the middle of nowhere? That question can't be answered until you die. Do you know who you are when Death calls you? Will I know my name when I'm dead? Will I remember my life or who was in it? I picture myself dyin by a gunshot. I even dream it. When I woke up blood was really there but it was a scab that I thought was bleeding. I thought about killing myself at one time but I thought about mother, how will she feel? For some reason when I'm in between those walls I think about what if my mother dies? I cry but it is just a what if. Me and my brother always said when we die we will die by killing ourselves but I don't think we will really do it.

The Last Spin Pt.2

Teacher's note: This is a wonderful continuation of Even Hunter's "The Last Spin". Students will enjoy reading this wonderful piece by CB. Students were assigned to continue the story were Hunter left off.

The Last Spin continued...

Still shocked from the blood gushing on the back walls all I could think was,
“Was it even worth it”?

Deep down I was still wondering what I could have done to persuade him to put the gun down but I didn’t want it to seem like I was the scared one.
About 10 minutes from my pondering on how much Danny and I had in common, José came down and said, “Come on Tigo lets go ESE la policiấ is outside”.
I went outside trying to keep up with Jose, thinking about what Danny and I had discussed. The sirens were blaring loud as they turned the corner. José and the other club members hopped fences and scattered in their opposite directions. When I reached home I smelt the warm papayas on the stove and the sound of my father beating my mother coming from the back room. I ran to the back room to pull him off my mother once again. Days were always like this at my house and it doesn’t really bother me. I wanted to rest because at 9:30 I had a club meeting to attend.
I went to my room and blasted the reggaeton loud to block out my crying sister and the arguing on the other side of the door. Then I got a phone call from my girl (Juana); she wanted me to come over. I hopped in the shower and got fresh for her with my green silk jacket with the orange stripes on it. I went to her house and we chilled for a little bit. Her mom don’t really like me that much because she know about my colors so we had to take our business else where. 9:30 came I gave her a kiss goodbye and headed to the spot. “Man I know I don’t want to be down for the mission tonight but… Man I don’t want to be in this club any more.” I promise my self that after tonight I’m out… I’m going to go to school and get job make my moms proud.”

“Aye Tigo!” I heard José say, pulling up in his black Crown Vick. “Get in we’re going for a ride.” The dudes in the front seat were sipping on some 40s and the other rolling a blunt in the back seat. About five minutes later we pulled up in front of the corner store down the block. José tossed me a black ski mask and told me to stick and move. We all started to get out the car until I said, “Aye homes let’s think about this.” Jose shoved me and said, “Tigo man stop acting like a B****.” So I went in thinking, “This is the last time”, repeating over and over. I pulled out the gun on the Asian man and said, “Open the register hurry up.” Next thing I know there were six black boys running in the store with the same color jacket Danny had on. Blasting my friends left to right! BOOM BAM! I try to get out the store but it was too hot so I decide to hide behind the aisle with the cereal. I turned around to feel a silver pistol in my temple….



- CBXOXOXO

A Better Life

I am only an immigrant looking for a better life without knowing what will happen later in the future, just waiting fort my time to come, but I been waiting too long for what's going to happen to me. I'm still trying to be legal in this country but I hope someday I may be. I am still waiting for the next day to come sitting 24/7 in my cell but sometimes I feel like giving up. I can't take no more, someone give me a break, god please give me a sign. I been doing good these few days that I been locked up. What have I done wrong to deserve this? It's because I had some cocaine in my right jeans pockets. Please judge have mercy. Everybody deserves a second chance or third chance, cuz I know if you send me to my country, I will suffer from eating. I won't have nothing to eat, not even frijoles and rice. I won't be able to get a job, cuz my record is bad. I feel sad and the cholos will be looking for me. They will know I'm back home but I will go away from home cuz ellos me qieren matar, but I pray to God nothing wrong me. Later in the future I want to be someone . I don't want to be the same person anymore. I will change if you give me another chance, so please Lord, tell the judge I want to stay here.

None

I hate having to be here again and miss time. I don't think I will be going home any time soon and it sucks because I can't see the people I care about, like my girlfriend and friends and family. I also don't know how long my girl is going to wait for me. It is also hard because there is no one I can talk to about all these things that are bothering me and I have no control over what the judge is going to do. My P.O. also came and told me that the police came to her and said that I am looking at 40 new charges just since I've been in here. It is sometimes hard to sleep at night because I have so much on my mind and have no control over the situation and can only wait to see what they are going to do with me.

Goals

Teacher's Note: We recenly hosted an amazing guest speaker, Komplex, who challenged us all to dream big!

When I grow up, I would like to be a Forensic Scientist. I would like to do that because it grabs my interest. I find the study of bodies interesting and I would be willing to study for it. I know that with science comes a lot of math but I know that I can do it. I also learned that if I dream big, then eventually, my dreams will come to pass. I also understand that you will have to plan and visualize your plan.